Dubstoevsky and the Triumph on Justice Hill: Phil and Paul with the Call

The Scene: Wednesday, July 13. West Boylston. 6:00 PM. Still hot, upper 80s, but the sun is falling and much of the hilly, rural route is shaded. 19 cyclists in a rainbow of bright racing kits getting under way. Let's go to Phil and Paul with the call.

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Phil: Well, Paul, it's a glorious evening for cycling and I have a feeling that we're going to see some superb riding tonight.

Paul: I think you're absolutely right about that, Phil. We've got an interesting group of 19 riders on the road tonight, including the Spanish conquistador, Diego dela Sangre Toro, the Colombian climber, Georgie Pie, the ever unpredictable Frantic, and that quiet assassin, Donny Bolo. But as good as these guys are, you've got some unknown, unheralded cyclists as well, guys who are eager to test themselves against the leaders and possibly make a name for themselves, so you never know what might happen.

Phil: That's true indeed, Paul, there are some hungry riders in this group, for sure. Right now, as we cruise along the well-shaded Waushacum Rd, the group is all together but I have a feeling that one or two of them are itching to get things started. You can see the no-name rider in the rather bland kit moving up on the outside, he's followed by the one woman in this peloton, Red Sonia, she might have something special in mind today.

Georgie Pie (l) and Heavy Weight (r)

Paul: Red Sonia is a powerful rider, Phil, but I don't think this stage suits her tonight. On rolling terrain, she is a proven locomotive, but in the hills - and tonight's stage has at least two cat 4 climbs - she'll have a hard time staying with D Bolo or G Pie.

Phil: That's a good point, Paul. I have a feeling that the big climb up Holden St will begin to sort things out a bit, and if not that climb then surely the ascent on Justice Hill Rd will tell us who in this group is the night's king of the mountain.

Paul: There's one rider we haven't talked about much and that's because we haven't seen him that much. He rides for an obscure team of suspicious origin that, frankly, exists on the fringes of Big Time amateur cycling and that rarely manages to get itself organized properly. I'm referring, of course, to Dubstoevsky, the leader of Team Shad.

Phil: I'm glad you brought him up, Paul, because he really could be the wild card tonight. We had a look at him about a month ago and at the time he showed promise but didn't seem to be on form. Since then, we've heard that he's been training quite hard.

Paul: Not only that, Phil, but we've heard that during particularly rigorous stretches of training, he refuels by consuming large quantities of grilled offal - sweetbreads, ox hearts, water buffalo kidneys, the sand-filled crops of roughed grouse - and washes it all down with a special India Pale Ale brewed in his hometown.

Dubstoevsky's training drink

Phil: That's very interesting indeed, Paul, I've never heard of a rider training on sweetbreads and ox hearts before. There's no penalty for a rider testing positive for mammalian heart tissue in his stool, so why not?

We've passed the Sterling Airport now and while there was a little split of the peloton back at the left hand turn off Muddy Pond Rd, it's all back together as we approach the intersection of rt 140 and 62. In a moment we'll be on the first climb of the day.

Paul: That's right, Phil, and though they've been riding more or less as a group, you can just see some of the nervous excitement as the riders try to position themselves for the climb ahead. No one wants to be dropped off the back on the first climb of the day.

Phil: No they don't, Paul, and that's why you can see dela Sangre Toro, Georgie Pie, Apostle John, and Sonia Red move to the front. There's Joshua Tree there too, and Frantic moving forward. Here they go now, they're on the slope and getting out of their saddles, and here comes Dubstoevsky on the outside! He started maybe halfway down the affair and look at that, he's moved easily by Red Sonia and Apostle John, and he's left Joshua Tree behind like a discarded tissue!

Well I'm amazed, Paul, he's still in the saddle and is simply riding right past the others. He's not going to catch dela Sangre Toro but is he trying to make a point here?

Paul: He certainly is, Phil. And there goes Georgie Pie on the attack!

Phil: He's bobbing up and down and trying to pull away from Dubstoevsky but look at this, the obscure shad man is not falling away, he's still in the saddle and putting in a big effort and he's clawing his way up to Georgie Pie. Now it's the three of them pulling away, dela Sangre Toro fifty feet up the road, followed by Georgie Pie and locked on his wheel, Dubstoevsky.

Paul: Now that's a fine piece of riding, Phil. It looked to me like Dubstoevsky knew exactly what he was doing. He hit the climb in the middle of the pack but to the outside so that he had room to move around other riders. I think he was taking stock of the others and when he saw everyone quickly get out of the saddle in anticipation of the climb's first steep grip, he realized that, 'Hey, these boys are afraid of this climb' and off he went.

Phil: First over the top goes to dela Sangre Toro, second to Georgie Pie, and third to Dubstoevsky. Red Sonia, Donny Bolo follow and join up but the peloton has split apart on this climb. Those who were caught out have all now labored over the top and are desperately trying to catch up with the leading group of five. The tempo has definitely picked up, hasn't it Paul?

Mason Rd

Paul: It certainly has, Phil, and it looks like the group of five on the front mean business. They're keeping the pace high and challenging those in arrears to prove themselves worthy to be called cyclists.

Phil: After that display on the Holden St hill, Paul, I'm wondering if Dubstoevsky might have a card or two up his sleeve.

Paul: He's keeping himself at the front and that says to me that, yes, he's got a plan, he knows exactly what he wants to do, he's ridden these roads before, he knows these climbs from the days when Team Shad was based in Lemonstar and rode regularly to the summit of the Mont Vontusett. I think we're seeing something special today.

Phil: Well, after a short chase along Mason Rd, they're all back together again and are flying up Gleason Rd, a beautiful country road, quite smooth, but with a short little incline at the end.

Paul: Yes, Phil, it's a nasty little climb, short but surprisingly steep. And look at that, Dubstoevsky moves effortlessly passed Frantic who seems to be having an off day today.

Phil: Well, that's too bad because now we're heading at speed toward the proving ground, the ascent of Justice Hill Rd.

Paul: That's right, Phil, a category 4 climb and it hits you hard right away. That's a 14% gradient at the base and then it settles in to around 6 or 7 percent to the top, a half mile up.

Phil: So here we go, we're racing along Lucas Rd to the base of Justice Hill and there's some jockeying going on, Frantic has moved ahead of Dubstoevsky who sits on the wheel of Red Sonia. Georgie Pie and Donny Bolo follow just behind. dela Sangre Toro has opted out of this climb and has followed a teammate up the other side of this ascent, the Justice Hill Cut-off, but there's Joshua Tree and Apostle John and Heavy Duty pulling themselves forward.

Now they've hit the 14% beginning and up out of the saddle goes Frantic and Red Sonia, and there goes Dubstoevsky! As soon as Red Sonia left her saddle, Dubstoevsky moved right around her and is now powering up the slope. Frantic is stamping on the pedals and rocking back and forth in a, well, frantic effort to keep in contact but to no avail, he's falling away. And look at this, Donny Bolo is caught behind and can't pull himself past Frantic!

This is incredible!

Paul: Yes it is, Phil, we are looking at a man possessed. Dubstoevsky is still in the saddle and is gradually pulling away from the elite riders in this peloton, as well as everyone else. And again, Phil, I think he planned this all along, he knew that if he got to the climb in the front of the group that he would make his move on the steepest part, and he's done exactly that. Look at the gap now, Phil, it's five seconds and climbing.

Phil: Well, we are seeing a superb ride by a relatively unknown rider who is now shaking up the peloton and is leaving the big favorites behind. But look, we've got a move coming here from Georgie Pie!

Paul: Yes we do, Phil, he's watched Dubstoevsky rip the peloton apart and he's said to himself 'enough is enough' and now he's making a huge effort to pull himself back and close the gap. Just look at the face of the Colombian climbing champion!

Phil: Dubstoevsky is keeping the pace high, keeping the pedal revolutions high. He's in his smallest gear and steadily turning those cranks, while Georgie Pie is out of the saddle and pistoning up and down like a jack hammer. And he's closing the gap!

Paul: Dubstoevsky can't panic in a moment like this, he knows that Georgie Pie is coming but he's not looking over his shoulder, he's keeping his head down and his cadence steady, he's locked in and focused.

Phil: They're nearing the summit now and here comes Georgie Pie, he's making his move, he's going to catch Dubstoevsky surely!

Paul: Dubstoevsky has kicked again!

Phil: Well this is a desperate battle now as the two are nearly side by side and Georgie Pie is hammering away but Dubstoevsky is giving up nothing! He down shifts and pushes again and tops the climb and takes first place by inches, Georgie Pie comes in a fraction of a second behind, oh my goodness, Paul, that was an amazing demonstration on the slopes of Justice Hill.

Paul: Yes it was, Phil, Dubstoevsky emptied his suitcase of courage on that effort and he stunned the entire peloton by dispatching one of the best climbers in the Greater Woo Valley, Georgie Pie.

Phil: And with that, we'll take a break. See you in a moment.

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