George Street Challenge 2017 Results

The results are in!

George Street Challenge 2017

Note that Dubstoevsky had to enter this challenge under an alias, Patrick Warner, in the men's 50-59 age group. The name, cycling historians and enthusiasts of arcane lore will know, is a loose Anglicization of the name of the eccentric Franco-Teutonic cyclist of the late 1800s and early 1900s, Patrique von Bongwarren. 

von Bongwarren family crest

The von Bongwarren clan, the result of the unlikely coupling of an aristocratic Prussian family and a down-at-the-barricades Alsatian brood, might have faded into ancestral obscurity if not for the cycling exploits of Patrique, the third son of Klaus & Simone von Bongwarren. 

Patrique, at age 13, entered the 1893 youth edition of Liège–Bastogne–Liège (minimum age was 16 but young Patrique bluffed his way in), won the race, and went on to be an perennial power in the spring classics. Known for his raw bursts of acceleration on steep climbs, and for his voracious thirst for Belgian abbey ale (he filled his bidet with it), Patrique von Bongwarren was a colorful character as well as a relentless competitor.

At the start of the 1907 season, however, he shocked his fans and the cycling world by announcing his retirement from the sport. Shortly thereafter, he abandoned his inherited chateau, gave away his acclaimed wine collection, and moved to southern California to farm pomegranates. 

See George Street Challenge 2017 for the recap.

George Street Challenge 2017

Starting Line
July 23, 2017
George St from Main St, Worcester, Mass

The official results have not been posted yet as I, Dubstoevsky, sit at Shad Bistro's only table typing up this recap of this morning's George Street Challenge, "the shortest race in America." It's essentially an uphill time trial that lasts (if you're pretty good) about 30 seconds or less, and if you're not all about climbing, then maybe you'll use a minute to get to the top. It's basically a 500 foot uphill sprint with a 17% average gradient. 

The competition was intense.

In a category all his own

Though despite (as mentioned) the International Association of Short Bike Races' officially sanctioned results have not yet been posted, we do know a few things about today's event with certainty.

Cello Dude

We know that a man with a cello strapped to his back took the challenge. We learned that the rider is a musician with a Mexican orchestra and that he never lets the cello out of his sight.

We know that the bright yellow pedicab ridden by an implacable Jamaican dude tenaciously and calmly peddled to the top, albeit with a pause or two en route. His ride was a crowd favorite.

We know the crowd was epic. Not just cyclists cheering on each other, but a whole line up of curious onlookers who lined the street and cheered with enthusiasm. There were cowbells and air horns. Everyone clapped and yelled.

We know that Dubstoevsky acquitted himself well and did not, as he did last year accidentally, stamp too hard on the pedals at the get-go, causing a slight wheelie; instead, this year, he caught the rhythm of the bike holder's release and eased into his launch with control. Underway smoothly, he hit it full force and powered upwards digging hard, downshifting at about the 3/4 mark, right at the slope's uptick, churning and thrashing the cranks to the line.

Are you kidding me?

Dubstoevsky's result? 31.62 seconds, nearly two seconds ahead of last year's result of 33.38. Sweet!

Which is ironic, actually, as I'd felt pretty crappy this morning, tired, drained from a migraine headache yesterday. My legs felt thick and unmotivated, stubborn. I timed my pre-race practice ride up at 47 seconds. I wasn't going all out but I didn't feel very powerful at all. I thought, well, fuck it, you're signed up so give it your best shot. If your legs fail, so be it.

But they didn't. 

So allez! Yes, we can surprise ourselves. 

***

Post Script: The results are in. 

The George Street Challenge: Team Shad Ascendant

Celebrate Major Taylor, the Worcester Whirlwind

Team Shad represented BIG at the George Street Bike Challenge for Major Taylor. Though neither Dubstoevsky nor Wing Nut bagged a top ten overall, Dubstoevsky came in #7 in his age bracket. For a superstitious rider whose lucky number is 33, the day was a giant success as he climbed the 18%, 500 ft hill in 33.38 seconds and ended up 33rd overall. Some powerful juju in those numbers.

Wing Nut, more of a Long Grind kind of rider than a Short Uphill Sprinter, still acquitted himself well with a time of 37 secs for 47th overall (out of 98 riders).

See the results here.

Regardless of our performance, what a great event! A bright sunny Sunday morning on the mostly quiet streets of the Woo. Bright jerseys, smiles all around, a festive air.

Wing Nut at the Apex

But Team Shad's day didn't end at the top of George St. Indeed, with Wing Nut in the Woo, we seized the opportunity to put some big miles under our tires and so set off for the summit of Mt. Wachusett, a ride that took us along myriad empty back roads, under underpasses, past reservoirs and trickling rivers, up and down relentless hills, all under a booming sun in a bright blue sky.

As we rode, we evaluated the season to date. Rasputitsa? Check. Tour de Heifer? Washed out. George Street Challenge? Check. One more huge event looms, the creme de la creme - the D2R2. Less than a month away. We feel ready. Wing Nut continues training savagely in the hills of western Mass, knocking off 50 milers day in and day out. Dubstoevsky, while not getting in near the mileage or elevation as Senor Nut, nevertheless continues to average 3+ rides a week, including a few competitive group rides with the likes of Georgie Pie and Diego dela Sangre Toro. It's mid-season and we're both in mid-season form, just where we want to be.

***

DESIGN SUBMISSIONS WANTED: Team Shad is seeking design suggestions for new team uniforms. The winning design will earn the artist(s) a private dinner with the Shad Men, with unlimited supplies of Be Hoppy, ox heart hash, and shad roe. Not to mention scintillating conversation rich with hyperbole, self-deprecation, and ribald humor.

The Day in Pictures: July 24, 2016

The venerable Armsby Abbey

The determined competition

George Street

Wing Nut poised for action

Shad at work

Don't Hate, Appreciate

The numerology of spin